It's All Right

Like I said, my father was cast in the mold of John Wayne, and my mother was a person who put my father first in all situations. What John Wayne thought, Dolly thought. She believed in "love", the kind where you were "swept off your feet" by a knight in shining armour to wait on John Wayne happily-ever-after.

But now Dolly has Altzheimer's Disease, and John Wayne is hardly given a thought, lost in the everyday activities of the retirement center, which consist mainly of moving furniture around with another resident and looking at squirrels. But even more alarming for her youngest daughter, Dolly has also forgotten me!

This became clear a few days ago when Georgia called. "Guess where I am?! In Dolly's room!" Surprised that Georgia had come all the way from Oregon without telling me, she proceeded to explain how busy she's been because two of her employees quit and she's been working 14-hour days. Here's more of the conversation:

Georgia: "I didn't even tell Willa I was coming that long ago!"
MJ: (She told Willa she was coming?)
Georgia: "I should have told you I was coming!"
MJ: "That's OK. "
Georgia: "No it isn't."
MJ: "How do you think Dolly is?"
Georgia: "I think Dolly's short term memory is better! She calls me and tells me what she has been doing!"

MJ: "Dolly calls you in Oregon and tells you what she did that day?"

Georgia: "Yes! Doesn't she call you?"

MJ: "No. She has never called me. Not once."

Georgia: "Oh!"

Later, I tried to sort out the issues, the pain, and my response. "That's OK?" That's all I could say? Fuckin-A!

It's not OK, Georgia. It's not OK that you didn't tell me you were coming. I could have taken a day off to be with you. It's not OK that you told Willa you were coming and not me. And it's not OK that Dolly has forgotten me.

My family seems to have misplaced me. In all the chaos, I have disappeared.