Memo

TO: Brethren of the Coast
RE: General information since our last meeting

1. The Pirate Code: Change in policy! Always use pirate references when talking about libraries. (Remember to modify last post to reflect this change in policy.) Libraries are suppressive obsessive compulsive ridiculous self important gate keeping sexually repressed people-hating institutions and must be skateboarded around as much as possible. While a buzz may be circulating that libraries are changing, we must be skeptical of any information coming from the library sciences. Arrrrrrr. And a pox on the no-trespassing bilge-sucking library wenches. Ye'll meet the rope's end for that, me bucko! Steal this magazine, aye!

2. Confidentiality Be Damned!: It has been brought to my attention that some lives are not truly "open books". This must be corrected immediately and the guilty party must leave updates on Update at the End of the World regularly that are not pain killer-induced diatribes, but actually understandable, coherent and informative (In the Sidebar, for your convenience).

3. Soapboxes are Essential: Charting new routes is not easy through unknown territory. We will keep our eyes open for places of refreshment and rest, trust the experienced navigators among us and hope that we have the fortitude to complete the journey. Of course I am strung-out wild crazy-eyed and unpredictable. That goes without saying, a prerequisite in the soapbox biz. And I smell. And invade your self-space, that holy-of-holies guarded and studied by you like the Shroud of Turin. Question at every turn.



4. Dress Code: Appropriate dress is no longer possible. Everyone must dress in a manner totally uncharacteristic to them. Also, a change of posture and demeanor is desirable.

5. Proposals Due: Proposals for the next phase of your life must be completed and approved by August 31 (No extensions and no excuses. Death is imminent, people. Wake up.).